Kiribati

Kiribati

Have you ever heard of Kiribati? I didn’t think so. It’s an undercover country made up of 33 islands. They have a measly 313 square miles of land, with a population of 117 thousand. They like to show off as a tourist attraction. 

While the Republic of Kiribati sounds like a wonderful place, there is an ugly truth. Their waters are filled with man-eating beasts such as sharks. The water is warm but not safe for any swimmers. You wouldn’t last 30 seconds. Therefore the Republic of Kiribati isn’t a great place to travel for a beach vacation. It’s extremely windy and hot. With being so unprotected from the weather, the wind whips through their palm trees constantly. 

The other dark truth is they really run an undercover mission to take over Russia. We have reasons to believe they are sick and tired of the hot windy weather. The republic is training an elite army, it’s a terrifying force. Their whole purpose is to sneak into Russia and take their vodka. This will slowly give the Russians no reason to stay. We expect in 10 years from now Kiribati will control most of the world around Russia, China, and Japan. We Americans need to prepare ourselves to not bow to Kiribati. A beach hut wouldn’t last long in Alaska anyway.

Before you decide to go to a random island in the middle of nowhere remember they could be trying to take over the world. Supporting them could help them build their elite army.